Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas wrote a book about marriage. It’s called “What Makes a Marriage Last: 40 Celebrated Couples Share with Us the Secrets.” In the book, they talk about their own marriage and share secrets from other couples.
Even though Marlo has been married to Phil for more than 40 years, she admits that when she was younger, she didn’t really want to get married.
In the book, Marlo Thomas talks about how she used to think marriage was like a vacuum cleaner that sucks out all your energy and ambition. She felt like living with a jailer you had to please.
But everything changed when she met Phil Donahue. They found each other after Phil’s first marriage ended, and now they have a strong bond that has lasted their whole lives.
Phil Donahue became famous with his TV show, “The Phil Donahue Show,” which later became just “Donahue.” It ran for 29 years and was the first show to let the audience join in. Marlo Thomas was a guest on his show, and meeting her changed Phil’s life.
The couple first met in Chicago in 1977. Phil Donahue already had four boys with him, and his fifth child, a daughter, lived with his ex-wife and her mother in another place.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before getting married in 1980 in a small ceremony with 35 people.
Marlo’s friends and family were surprised by her decision to get married, given her past views on marriage. The book tells a funny story about friends at Marlo’s bridal shower putting up quotes from her that showed her previous thoughts about marriage.
According to the book, Marlo’s mom was really surprised at their wedding and kept asking Phil, “How did you get her to do this?” Even strangers, like a woman on their honeymoon plane to Greece, were shocked and disappointed that Marlo, who was known for being independent, decided to settle down.
In the book, Marlo admits that this made her doubt her choice. She wondered if she was being hypocritical since she had criticized marriage for so long. She worried that she let down fans who saw her as a symbol of independence.
Despite the challenges, Phil and Marlo make their marriage work. They talk about the ups and downs in the book, saying that those tough times helped strengthen their bond.
In the early days of their marriage, they spent time apart because Phil was taping his show in Chicago, and Marlo was traveling for her acting career. Even though they weren’t always living together, Marlo’s aunt helped her see that marriage can mean different things to different people.
Despite the distance, Marlo and Phil made their marriage successful. And one important thing to note is that Marlo not only gained a husband but also gained children when she got married.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Marlo Thomas talked about helping to raise Phil’s children. She knew they already had a traditional mother, so she didn’t try to take on that role. Instead, she became more like a friend to Phil’s children, just like her own mother was to her.
Marlo says that her relationship with Phil’s children is even stronger now than when she first married Phil. In the book, Phil emphasizes that Marlo spent a lot of time talking to and trying to understand his sons.
Phil and Marlo think that the key to their long marriage is the trust they have in each other. Marlo says, “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back.”
Even though they’ve been married for over 40 years, they believe there are still more memories to create together.
Phil says that for a marriage to last, both people have to really want it. Marlo agrees and says that looking back, she wouldn’t have it any other way than being married to Phil. She points out that he has supported her in every possible way.
Marriage is a wonderful connection, especially when two people fully commit to it. This couple is truly inspiring and sets a great example for all of us. We should all aim for a relationship as successful as theirs!
My granddaughter evicted me for getting married at 80 – Unable to tolerate the disrespect, I decided to teach her a lesson
When my granddaughter threw me out after I got married at 80, I decided I couldn’t condone the disrespect. With my new husband, Harold, we devised a daring plan to teach her a lesson she’ll never forget, leading to a confrontation that would change our family forever.
I never thought I’d be telling this story, but here we are. My name is Margaret, and I turned 80 last spring. I lived in a cozy room in my granddaughter Ashley’s house. It was small, but I made it my own — filled it with memories and mementos from my past life.
“Morning, Grandma,” Ashley said one bright Saturday, barging into my room without knocking. She never knocked.
“Morning, dear,” I replied, folding my quilt. “What’s the rush?”
“We’re heading out to the park with the kids. Need anything?
“No, I’m fine. Go enjoy your day.”
She left in a hurry, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I couldn’t complain much — after all, I had sold my house to pay for her college. Her parents died in a car crash when she was just 15.
I took her in and did my best to give her a good life. Now she lived here with her husband, Brian, and their two children. Their home was spacious, lively, and often noisy.
Life took an interesting turn at the community center a few months back. I met Harold. He was charming, with a camera slung around his neck. We started talking, and before I knew it, I was looking forward to our meetings. It was like a second chance at love.
One afternoon, while Ashley was at work, I decided to share my news. I found her in the kitchen later that evening, pouring over some recipe book.
“Ashley, I have something to tell you,” I began.
She glanced up, “What’s up, Grandma?”
“I’ve met someone. His name is Harold, and… well, he proposed.”
She stared at me, eyebrows raised. “Proposed? As in marriage?”
“Yes,” I said, unable to hide my smile. “Isn’t it wonderful?”
Her reaction wasn’t what I expected. “Grandma, you’re 80. You’re too old for a wedding dress and all that. And Harold can’t move in here.”
I was taken aback. “Why not? We have plenty of space.”
“This is our home. We need our privacy.”
I tried to reason with her, but she wouldn’t listen. The next morning, she packed my belongings and set them by the door.
“Ashley, what are you doing?” I asked, tears welling up.
“You need to go, Grandma. Find somewhere else to live. Maybe Harold can take you in.”
I couldn’t believe it. After everything I had done for her — raising her, selling my house — she was kicking me out. I felt so betrayed as I stood there, looking at the boxes of my life packed up like unwanted clutter.
I didn’t have many options, so I called Harold. When I told him what happened, he was furious.
“She did what?” he shouted. “Margaret, get your things together, I’m coming to fetch you right now. You’re coming to stay with me.”
I hesitated. “I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You’re not a burden. You’re my future wife, and we’re in this together.”
With no other choice, I loaded my things into Harold’s car. As we drove away, I looked back at Ashley’s house, my heart heavy with disappointment.
At Harold’s, things felt different. He welcomed me with open arms, making me feel at home. We spent our days planning our future, but the hurt from Ashley’s betrayal lingered.
“We’ll teach her a lesson,” Harold said one evening, determination in his eyes. “She needs to understand respect.”
I didn’t know how we’d do it, but I trusted Harold. He had a way of making everything seem possible.
“Alright,” I agreed. “Let’s show her what we’re made of.”
And so, the plan began.
Harold and I spent countless evenings planning our next move. Harold, being a renowned photographer, had an idea to reach Ashley through her passion. She loved photography, and the annual local photographer’s gathering was something she wouldn’t miss for the world.
“Margaret,” Harold said one night, “I’ve got a ticket for the gathering. Ashley won’t be able to resist — I’ll courier the ticket to her, anonymously.
I nodded, feeling excited. “Let’s do it.”
Before the gathering, Harold and I got married in a small, intimate ceremony.
Harold insisted on taking photographs. He captured my happiness and the glow of a second chance at love. The photos were breathtaking, showing the joy in my eyes and the love between us.
The day of the photography event arrived, and Ashley, as predicted, attended. She didn’t know we were behind her invitation. Harold and I stood backstage, waiting for our moment. The anticipation was almost too much to bear, but we were determined to see it through.
The host called Harold on stage to present his award-winning photographs. As Harold walked out, the room buzzed with admiration. Then, the portraits of me in my wedding dress appeared on the big screen.
Gasps filled the room as the audience saw the radiant joy on my face. The images were stunning, capturing not just the beauty of the moment, but the depth of emotion behind it.
Harold stated: “I found love at 79, proving age is just a number. Margaret, my beautiful wife, has a youthful spirit and a heart full of love.”
I could see Ashley in the front row, her face turning red with embarrassment. Harold handed me the microphone, and I stepped forward, my heart pounding.
“Good evening,” I started. “I want to tell you about sacrifices and love. When my granddaughter, Ashley’s, parents died, I sold my house to pay for her education. I raised her as my own. But recently, she forgot that love and respect.”
The audience was silent, their attention on me. “Ashley,” I continued, looking directly at her, “I still love you despite the hurt. But you needed to learn the value of respect.”
Ashley’s eyes filled with tears. She looked down, clearly feeling the weight of her actions.
Harold then spoke again, “Margaret and I decided to share our story to show that love and respect know no age. Family should be about support and understanding.”
The audience burst into applause, admiration evident in throughout the hall. After the event, Ashley approached us, tears streaming down her face.
“Grandma, Harold,” she began, her voice shaking, “I’m so sorry. I was wrong and disrespectful. Can you ever forgive me?”
Harold and I shared a glance before I pulled Ashley into a hug. “Of course, dear. We love you. We just needed you to understand.”
She invited us to a family dinner, promising to support my happiness and never take me for granted again. We accepted, hopeful for a new beginning.
That evening, we joined Ashley and her family. The atmosphere was warm, filled with genuine attempts to rebuild our relationships. Laughter and conversation flowed easily, and for the first time in a long while, I felt truly at peace.
During dinner, Ashley turned to me. “Grandma, I didn’t realize how much I hurt you. I was selfish and ungrateful.”
“It’s okay, Ashley,” I said, placing my hand on hers. “What’s important is that we move forward together.”
Brian, Ashley’s husband, who had been mostly silent, chimed in: “We’re glad you’re happy, Margaret. Harold, you seem like a good man. We’re lucky to have you both in our lives.”
Harold smiled. “Thank you, Brian. We’re happy to be here.”
The children, sensing the positive change, started showing us their latest drawings and school projects. It was a joyous sight, a family coming together again. The warmth in the room was palpable, and I felt a renewed sense of belonging.
As the evening progressed, Harold shared more stories about our adventures and how we met. Ashley listened intently, occasionally wiping away tears. It was clear she was genuinely remorseful and wanted to make amends.
After dinner, as we sipped tea in the living room, Ashley turned to me again. “Grandma, I want you to move back in with us. We have plenty of space, and I promise things will be different.”
I looked at Harold, who nodded in agreement. “We appreciate the offer, Ashley, but Harold and I have our own place now. We’ll visit often, though.”
Ashley smiled, a bit sad but understanding. “I get it. I just want you to be happy.”
“I am happy,” I assured her. “And so are you. That’s all that matters.”
As we left that night, the moon casting a gentle glow over everything, I reflected on the importance of self-love and standing up for oneself. Life’s unexpected joys often come when we least expect them.
And as I looked around the table, I felt grateful for the second chance at happiness and the family that, despite everything, remained dear to my heart.
Harold and I drove home in silence, both lost in our thoughts. When we finally arrived, he took my hand and said, “We did it, Margaret. We really did it.”
I smiled, feeling a sense of accomplishment and relief. “Yes, we did. And it’s just the beginning.”
Harold kissed my hand, and we walked into our home, ready for whatever the future held. Our love and determination had taught Ashley a valuable lesson, and in turn, brought us all closer. It was a new chapter, filled with hope and endless possibilities.
What would you have done?
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