Why More Happy Couples Prefer to Sleep in Separate Beds

According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.

We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.

A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.

According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.

Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.

Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.

Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.

According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.

Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.

Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”

How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.

Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.

Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.

During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.

Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.

People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.

  • “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
  • “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
  • “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
  • “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420

What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?

Recognize her? Better sit before you learn her true identity…

Joan van Ark was born on June 16, 1943, in New York City, New York. Her parents were not connected to the film industry.

When Joan was a teenager acting in Denver, she met actress Julie Harris, and their lives would never be the same.

Julie pushed her to go to the highly regarded Yale Drama School and gain admission using a scholarship she had also set up.

Joan van Ark was born on June 16, 1943, in New York City, New York. Her parents were not connected to the film industry.

When Joan was a teenager acting in Denver, she met actress Julie Harris, and their lives would never be the same.

Julie pushed her to go to the highly regarded Yale Drama School and gain admission using a scholarship she had also set up.

This made Joan Van Ark the second-ever woman to enroll at the Drama School

She [Harris] wrote to the dean and asked him to meet me. “Long story short, my parents drove me to New Haven, Connecticut, to meet the dean, who gave me a scholarship,” Joan recalled.” It was meant to be.” Joan went on to perform in the theatre for a few years, but her real passion was in Television.

Temperature’s Rising, Spider-Woman, and Days of Our Lives

Joan achieved enormous renown as a result of her roles in Temperature’s Rising, Spider-Woman, Days of Our Lives, and even one Bonanza episode. But her role as Valene Ewing on Dallas in 1978 was where she first achieved great popularity. She ended up playing the most important role she has ever had.

Because of how popular the show was, Joan appeared on its spin-off, Knots Landing. a program that was actually written prior to Dallas. Dallas was initially chosen by the producers because it was the best option for portraying affluent households at the time. Joan was then forced to play the same part in Dallas instead of joining the Knots Landing cast.

13 Seasons of Knots Landing ensued for Joan Van Ark

The person who actually convinced Joan to accept the part while already working on two other projects was her husband, renowned newscaster John Marshall. There was a moment when Val Ewing’s mother was scheduled to make her television debut. Surprise, surprise—Julie Harris was chosen for the position. The person who mattered the most to her in all the world was this.

“When the producers told me they had finally last someone to play my mother, I held my breath,” she recalled in a 1984 interview with Florida Today. “I thought, ‘Oh my God, are they going to say Phyllis Diller or Zsa Zsa Gabor, or who?’ Then they said it was Julie Harris, and I went right through the roof. I couldn’t believe they had picked her to be my mother. They didn’t even know we were friends.”

327 Episodes later, Joan Van Ark was ready for new ventures

13 Seasons and 327 episodes later, Joan left a season before the show saw its final season air. She knew many blamed her leaving on the cancellation of the show, but she was ready for new adventures. “I have loved more than life the 13 years I’ve had on that show,” she said. “[Knots Landing creator] David Jacobs is a great influence on my life, has taught me so much about so many things.”

Ted [Shackelford] is the other half of every breath I take on the show, and personally, he’s a large part of my heart. The people are my family–we have shared marriages, deaths, and divorces. It’s far more difficult to leave than I thought.” Joan thereafter appeared on The Young and The Restless as Gloria Fisher.

In high school, John Marshall first met Joan, and the two quickly got married. They have a lovely daughter named Vanessa Marshall who works in the entertainment industry at the moment. After 56 years of marriage, the pair is still very much in love and leads extremely private lives away from the spotlight.

78 years old with a net worth of $10 million

At 78 years old, Joan has amassed a $10 million net worth and is still as gorgeous as ever when seen out and about in Los Angeles. She was last seen three years ago and was just seen paying for parking at a meter while wearing workout clothes and a ponytail.

She co-starred in the 2017 television film Psycho Wedding Crasher, which was her most recent and final appearance on screen.

Joan Van Ark, who has worked in the film industry for the past 50 years, has joined The Actor’s Studio as a life member. What an icon!

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