Only weeks after Millie Smith and Lewis Cann learned they were having twin baby girls, they learned that only one would survive.
On April 30, after 30 weeks of a high-risk pregnancy, Smith delivered identical twins, Callie and Skye, the latter who lived only three hours.
Later in neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), Callie slept without her sister in the incubator, with her loving and grieving parents watching over her. In the unit with other babies, an overwhelmed mom of healthy newborn twins innocently told Smith that she was “so lucky” to not have two babies.
Crushed by the words, the new mom couldn’t find the words to explain her loss. Then, she realized that Skye’s legacy was to help other families who lose a child, and it came in the form of a purple butterfly.
In November 2015 Millie Smith and partner Lewis Cann found out they were having their first Child. Smith, who has twins in the family, said she had a “gut feeling” about having a duo and 10 weeks later, doctors confirmed she was expecting identical twin girls.
Less than two weeks after the excitement of knowing they would double the children in their home, the British couple were devastated to learn that one of their babies had a fatal condition and wouldn’t survive after birth.
“During the scan, the doctor didn’t say anything. I was very excited and loved seeing the little babies, but she was silent. Both Lewis and I immediately knew there must be a problem,” Smith said.
Doctors shared the news that one of the babies had anencephaly, which according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) affects about one in 4,600 babies across the U.S. It’s a serious birth defect where a baby is born without parts of the brain and skull, and “almost all babies born with anencephaly will die shortly after birth.”
Knowing that one baby would die soon after birth, and that there were risks involved for their other baby, the couple decided to move forward with the extremely high-risk pregnancy.
Over the next several months, Smith and Cann named their twins Skye and Callie. “We knew that Skye needed to have a name before she was born,” Smith said. “Knowing she would only survive for seconds or minutes, I wanted her to be named during that time.”
The meaning behind “Skye,” she explained “was somewhere we knew she would always be, that we could look up at the sky and remember our baby.”
When Smith went into labor after only 30 weeks on April 30, she needed an emergency C-section. To help navigate the loss, the couple had a “bereavement midwife” during the birth, and they were put I a special room the called the “Daisy Room,” where families can spend time with a baby before and after she/he passes.
“When the girls were born, they both cried. This was a huge moment, as we were told that Skye would not make a noise or move,” said Smith, who was thankful to have three hours with Skye before she died. “We were cuddling Skye when she passed away. This was the worst moment in our lives. I have never ever felt heartbreak like that before. But I am proud that she fought for so long to spend time with us.”
Born premature, Callie had to stay in NICU while she gained some strength and also in the unit were three other sets of twin.
“Most of the nurses were aware of what had happened, but as time passed, people stopped talking about Skye. After about four weeks, everyone acted as though nothing had happened, meaning the families around me had no idea about our situation,” Smith recalled.
One morning, a stressed mother whose twins were also in NICU, harmlessly said to Smith that she was “so lucky” to not have twins.
“None of the other parents knew what had happened or anything about Skye. The comment was completely innocent and more out of humor…They weren’t to know that I did at one point have two.” Smith continued, “But the comment nearly broke me. I ran out [of] the room in tears and they had no idea why. I didn’t have the heart to tell them what had happened. A simple sticker would have avoided that entire situation.”
It was in that moment Smith realized she had to create something that would speak for parents who had just lost a baby, ensuring the misunderstanding never happens again.
She designed a poster for the NICU explaining both hospital personnel and visitors that any incubator with a purple butterfly on it means that one or more babies, in a set of multiples were lost.
“I chose butterflies, as I felt it was fitting to remember the babies that flew away, the color purple because it is suitable for both boys or girls,” said Smith.
The purple butterfly concept–now under the Skye High Foundation–has spread to hospitals in several countries around the world.
Callie is now a lively, happy seven-year-old, and twin’s memory lives in purple butterfly cards along with other initiatives to help families with babies like Skye all over the world. The purple butterflies now come in numerous forms, like ornaments, cards, blankets, stuffed animals and more.
“Ultimately I will never be able to stop this from happening but the more support groups we can set up and put things in place like the stickers the better it will be. It’s the hardest thing anyone has to deal with,” Smith said.
Internet Erupts as Dad Defends Kissing Son on the Lips!
Tom from England loves showing affection to his young son, Roman. However, when their sweet moments were shared on social media, not everyone was happy.
Some people criticized Tom for kissing his five-year-old son on the lips, accusing him of confusing his child. But Tom, from northern England, isn’t backing down. He’s using humor and simple logic to fight back against the trolls. Roman supports his dad, telling the critics, “You are all crazy!”
The bond between a parent and child is special and helps shape the child’s morals, principles, and personality. Every parent has their own way of raising their children, influenced by factors like culture, socioeconomic status, health, or personal preference.
Tom, from Yorkshire, England, is a loving father of two. He doesn’t let the negative comments from trolls affect his parenting style. He often posts videos on TikTok and gets a lot of attention from women who admire his blue eyes, accent, fit and tattooed body, and most importantly, his love for his sons, 5-year-old Roman and Raphael Reign, who was born in mid-May 2023.
A lot of Tom’s videos on TikTok show him addressing accusations that he’s confusing Roman and putting him in danger of strangers or infections.
But Tom won’t give up.
On June 27, a user told Tom, “Just gorgeous both but don’t kiss him on the lips.” Tom responded by saying he would continue showing his five-year-old son love as long as Roman allowed it. Tom said, “I find it worrying that it bothers you. I will kiss my son, my five-year-old child, on the lips for as long as I deem necessary and as long as he lets me, right, because I love him to bits and he’s my best pal. One day he won’t want me to, and he probably won’t want much to do with me. So, for now, I’ll carry on as I am.”
Fans shared supportive comments like, “Love kisses with my kids and now my granddaughter–the people who think it’s wrong are the worry xx.” Another person, who lost her father, said: “Absolutely ridiculous! I always kissed my dad on the lips, and I lost him 2 years ago. I wish I could cuddle him and kiss him again.”
Tom replied to the kind comments, saying, “He is the most loving little boy, and it’s because we raise him with love. Thank you for these comments.”
However, one user’s outrageous accusation got a quick response from Tom. The person wrote, “Shouldn’t kiss him because of the bacteria in your mouth. Did you know you can make your child more susceptible to cavities if you have them and kiss them?”\
In a popular post with almost 123,000 likes, Tom shared a witty message: “Wow. So if I kiss my 5-year-old son on the lips, he’ll get cavities. He’ll get cavities from his daddy kissing him.” Tom then asked Roman what he thought. Giggling, Roman replied, “Don’t be silly!” and kissed his dad on the lips.
Fans had a lot to say about the unfounded claim that Tom kissing Roman could cause cavities. One person wrote, “Omg …who educated that person…you kiss away, you two,” while another added, “That is soooo ridiculous…and I work with a dentist. Carry on being the loving dad you are… your son is so cute.”
In early July, Tom posted a viral video of him and Roman sitting in a car, with nearly 579,000 likes. In the video, Tom said, “Don’t worry. Absolutely nothing’s going to change.” He then turned to his son and asked, “Roman, what do you think of people who say you shouldn’t kiss me on the lips?”
Roman responded emphatically, “You are all crazy. That’s my daddy!” The video ended with the pair sharing a sweet kiss.
Fans jumped in defending the cause of his post, and supporting the father, one writes, “Some people are just sick he is adorable and would soon tell ya when he gets older if he didn’t like it.” Another writes, “we kiss on the cheeks in my culture, but i really love that father-son relationship.”
One user chimed in and speaking to the Yorkshire father’s trolls, she asked “have you a problem with him kissing him on the lips because he is a man? Because if this was his mom, I’m sure you wouldn’t.”
Responding to the comment and thanking the woman for highlighting the issue, Tom said, “I’ve genuinely been curious about this because it’s something I’ve thought about too. I don’t think anyone would say anything if it was a mom kissing her little boy. For some reason, when it’s a dad kissing his son, people always have something to say, and I don’t understand why—it’s always this weird minority.” He added, “I’m glad a woman brought this up, so I really appreciate that. And I’m not changing anything.”
In another video, Tom looks visibly frustrated as he responds to a comment suggesting that kissing his son could make the boy vulnerable to dangerous strangers. The commenter wrote, “Don’t kiss your children on the lips, fact. Because not all humans have the right intentions. Do you see what I’m saying? Don’t make it acceptable!”
Tom joked in his response, “So the logic here is, if I kiss my five-year-old, he will think that he can go off and it’s okay to kiss strangers, strange adults… obviously!” Holding back his laughter, he continued, “So let’s apply that logic. I can’t have him in my car anymore to take him places because he could get in a stranger’s car and think that’s normal. He can’t live in my house anymore…well he could just walk into a stranger’s house and think that that’s normal.”
Then, the devoted dad suggested a different approach: “Or we could, now hear me out, we could… teach him that he’s got a mummy and a daddy and kissing them is normal but kissing dodgy Barry down the road is a bit weird.”
Most people in his online community support Tom and love seeing the affection he shows his son. They’re happy that Tom doesn’t back down to online trolls who have no right to tell him how to parent.
What do you think about dads kissing their children on the lips? Do you think it’s okay for moms to do the same?
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